I will never forget that night. I was lying in bed when I heard God call my name and I responded, "Here I am." God then said, "Take your son, your only son, Issac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about." After that, nothing. No reason, no other explanation, nothing.
I did not sleep that night. I thought to myself trying to figure out, "Why God is telling me to do this? Did He not say to me that through Issac, will be made a great nation? So why?" All of these "why" questions and not a single answer. God knows how much I love my son and He wants to take him away from me now.
I spend countless hours wrestling with these questions, trying to understand God's intentions. It was then I realized that I wasn't going to get any answers. God has commanded me to do this and that I must do it, even though I can never understand why.
It is now the third day of our travels and no I can see the place in the distance. These last couple of days, I was hoping that God would say something to retract his command but nothing. I look at my son Issac and he was pretty excited that we were close to the place. I think to myself, "I am actually going to have to go through with this." I paused for what seemed like an eternity and finally decided to continue on. I realized that my love for God is far more greater than my love for my own son.
So I told my servants to stay with the donkey and took Issac with me. I allowed Issac to carry the wood while I carried the knife and fire. Issac loves to help me out with this and tells me all about the great times him and his friends had. I just love hearing about his stories and adventures.
As we continues to walk I just want to cry. A huge lump starts to come into my throat and my heart is starting to beat faster and faster. Issac looks around and says, "The fire and wood are here, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" What a smart kid. Holding back the tears
and swallowing the huge lump in my throat, I told him "God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son."
Shortly after, we reached the place where God told me about. I spent the next hour building the alter taking my time. In the background I can hear Issac occupying himself and playing with a bug of some sort. Once I am finished building it, my son asks again, "Where is the lamb?" I don't answer. Instead, I tell him to come to me. He walks over. I kneel down looking face to face to him. So innocent, so young. I told that we were going to play a game and that if he followed the rules, I would give him an extra helping of dessert. My son was so excited because he LOVED his dessert. I told him that it was a trust game and that he needed to be completely still and close his eyes and not peek. That he needed to trust in me. Issac nodded understanding the rules and proceeded to close his eyes and just stand still. He's such a good boy.
I took out the rope and bound him and kept asking him if he was peeking. Of course he wasn't, he REALLY wanted the extra dessert. I pick him up, eyes still closed and placed him on the alter. It was at this moment that I couldn't hold back the tears. My heart felt like it was going to explode. Every part of me was telling me that I shouldn't go through with this but I reach for my knife anyways. I grab onto the hilt and pull it out of the sheath. It felt heavy, I just wanted to drop it and go home. I look at the blade and then look at my son, lying there still as a statue eyes still closed. Tears streaming down my face I constantly fight against the urge to turn away. I slowly bring up the knife ready to slay my son. Whatever I have been feeling has now been magnified 10 times. I take one last teary look at my son. I lift up my dagger, ready to strike.
Just as I am about to plunge the dagger into my son, I hear a clear voice calling, "Abraham! Abraham!" It was one of the LORD's angles. "Here I am." I replied. The angle said, "Do not lay a hand on the boy. Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son." As soon as I heard this, I dropped the dagger and quickly unbound my son. I told him he could open his eyes and said that he won the game. He was so excited but then looked at me and asked, "Daddy, why are you crying?" All I could do was smile. What an observant kid I thought.
It was then we both hear something. We both look up and in the thicket a ram caught by its horns. I pointed to the ram and told Issac, "You see, the LORD provided the lamb for the burnt offering." So I took the ram and sacrificed it and named the place, The LORD Will Provide.
I then heard the angle call my name and he said, "I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son. I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me."
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So I was lying in bed last night and thought about how much Abraham loved the LORD that he was going to slay his ONLY son for Him. Now I thought about when Jesus came to the earth. Jesus was God's only son. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, and whosoever believes in him, shall not perish but have everlasting life." - John 3:16. Now think about this, if you draw a parallel between God and Abraham, and Jesus and Issac. Both God and Abraham were willing to sacrifice their only son for Us and God respectively. Except the only difference is, Abraham did not have to sacrifice his son but Jesus was sacrificed.
Can we even being to fathom the love that Abraham had for God? Can we even fathom the love that God has for us? God spared Issac because he Loved us so much. So much that he sacrificed his OWN son. So if you are ever wondering if God Loves you, think about this. Think about the sacrifice that He has made for us.
For me, I've decided to quit Judo. For those who don't know me all that well, Judo is a HUGE part of my life. I've been doing it for 12 years and got my black belt. I've been coaching for 6 years and am very well respected as a coach throughout Saskatchewan and even in Ottawa. Coaching is something that I have a lot of joy in doing and I just love seeing the growth of my students. Slowly but surely, God has been breaking me out of Judo. It seems like everywhere I go, I don't have time for it. So now I've decided that I will give it up for God. I think in comparison to Abraham, that my situation is nothing in comparison to what Abraham had to do. This is just a little thing that I can do to tell God that I love him.
I pray that for those who spent the time reading this will be blessed and realize that God does love you.
God Bless!!
