The Body of Christ (Part 1)

1 Corinthians 12:12-20

The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body - whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free - and we were all given the one Spirit to drink.

Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body.

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How many of you say this, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body." How about if I put it in this way, how many of you compared yourselves to the worship leaders, pastors, small group leaders, etc? Have you thought after comparing yourself, "Oh I'll never be like them so I can't be effective in ministry at all." or "Since I am not like them, I won't be anything else."

I am constantly facing this temptation in compare myself to these worship leaders, pastors, small group leaders, etc. I compare my own achievements to them and I get depressed because I don't think I'm making any impact at all. My achievements don't match up to them at all. I was never happy with myself because I could never be like them.

I think the root of this thinking is the fact that we are never satisfied with how God has created us to be. So we always compare ourselves to others that we would like to be. We see something in the other person and we want that. So we try and be like the other person. However, as hard as we try, we never seem to be able to get the same reactions as they do. Do you know the reason why? It's because your not the other person, your you!

I had a very enlightening discussion with my pastor a couple of weeks ago and he has really helped me with appreciating who I am. That I am still part of the Body of Christ even though I'm not a small group leader or something "great" like that. I've realized that the gifts God has given me through my experiences has allowed me to be able to speak to certain people about specific life issues. These are some things that not many others can do. After the meeting with my pastor, I sat down and came up with this statement:

God has put you on this Earth to be you, not someone else. If you try being someone else, you will always set yourself up for disappointment and will never be happy. Your experiences, faults, gifts, successes, God has given you to make you unique and perfect for whatever role he has for you in the Body of Christ. Your worth is not determined by people or what other think of you, it is determined by God, and He has already given it to you. So be happy with what God has made you into. Remember God does not make junk.

We are all part of the Body of Christ and we cannot be effective as the Body of Christ until we can acknowledge our part in The Body. Are you able to look in the mirror and be happy with what you see?

For those who can say "yes" to that question. Great! Keep it up and continue your role in the Body of Christ. However, if your like me and can't say that yet, I want to challenge you to spend some time in prayer with God and talk to Him about your role in The Body of Christ. That He may reveal that to you and that you will be able to accept whatever He has for you.

God Bless.

Living Room

So this is a song that has been really impacting me lately. Unfortunately, there isn't any site that has the music to this so if your interested in hearing this song, please let me know and I can send it to you.

I hope you all enjoy the lyrics:

Living Room - Mark Harris

My life has been like an old house
Far past the outskirts of town
The kind that you see down a dirt road
And wonder why it's not torn down.

Abandoned and empty
Forgotten and appears
So overgrown and
Ravaged by the years

Chorus:

So come through the doorway
I’ve closed in the past
And tear down the walls of my pride
Open the windows and push out the darkness by
Letting in heaven’s pure light
Banish the silence and open this tomb.
Fill up my heart
And make it Your living room.

Let there be music and laughter
And let there be memories displayed
Moments are framed to remind me
Of your sweet goodness and grace

Let a fire burn brightly
And let it be known
To all who come near
This is your home

So Lord won't you come through the doorway
I’ve closed in the past
And tear down the walls of my pride
Open the windows and push out the darkness by
Letting in heaven’s pure light
Banish the silence and open this tomb.
Fill up my heart
And make it Your living room.

CHORUS

Lost Passion

What does it feel like when you are passionate about something? You feel motivated, driven, you love every aspect of it, you never get tired of it, in some ways you can be an expert in it, etc. Whenever you get the chance to do something relating to this passion, you feel at home and it is your time away from the stresses of reality. Does being passionate for something somewhat feel like that for you?

Well, that's the best way I could explain my passions. My passions included IVCF in ministering to university students/young adults and Judo through coaching and teaching important live values to the kids (and adults). Eventually, another passion was with my Environmental Engineering degree in wanting to fight against the water crisis overseas. These three things were the things that were driving me the most throughout most of my life. Judo being my biggest passion.

However, what happens when God is calling you somewhere else that is not your passion, or what if he takes away your passion? How does that feel? You have no motivation, you feel empty, lost, stressed, your not driven to move forward, in some cases your never happy, sometimes you feel left out and unloved, the list can go on. In this situation, how do you find that passion again? How do you know what your passion is anymore? Especially if it was God who removed your passion. How do you know when God is calling you towards something when you don't feel passionate about anything anymore?

These are all questions I have been asking myself lately. If some of you have been following some of my previous posts, my greatest passion is no more. That's right, Judo is done for me. After 12 years of dedicating my life to it and 8 years of coaching, I finally responded to God, calling me to quit Judo. Also, since I am "officially" done classes and University, I'm not serving on IVCF anymore which was another HUGE passion of mine. Even my passion for fighting against the water crisis is on the rocks right now because of these other two. To be honest, I really don't want to be an Engineer.

These three things were my passions. Everyone knew me for these passions, Christian and Non-Christian, and they really admired me for them. However, since they aren't necessarily my passions anymore, it's as if a HUGE hole is left in my life. Not being able to work towards something. It's extremely hard to deal with. As I'm talking and chatting with my friends, I feel like I can't contribute to a conversation because I don't feel like I have a passion I could talk about much. I love hearing about all the things my friends are doing realted to their passions. I love seeing their eyes light up when they get to talk about what they love to do the most.

That feeling, that light in my eyes, is something that I feel I'm really missing right now. I try and find new passions by trying out children's ministries or taking ballroom dancing classes but, it's not the same... I guess it will never be the same so long as I keep comparing them to what I use to do. Is it wrong to want to hold onto some of these things?

As I write this, I look back and say to myself, "Where is God in my passions?" Shouldn't God have His own category? I should still be passionate for God even if it isn't in a ministry setting. So the next question is... How does one become passionate for God without a ministry role? I've only known how to be passionate for God within a ministry. Am I to go out and seek ministry opportunities or just wait? These things have been weighing pretty heavily on my heart ever since IVCF has finished for me.

So I don't have any outstanding scriptures to share or an awesome devotion to end things off. This time, I'm asking for your advice and input. If you have any scripture or thoughts about this, I would love to hear about it.

God Bless.

Do you still not understand?

Mark 8:17-21

Aware of their discussion, Jesus asked them: "Why are you talking about having no bread? Do you still not see or understand? Are your hearts hardened? Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear? And don't you remember? When I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many basketfuls of pieces did you pick up?"
"Twelve," they replied.
"And when I broke the seven loaves for the four thousand, how many basketfuls of pieces did you pick up?
"They answered, "Seven."
He said to them, "Do you still not understand?"

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This piece of scripture relates to the disciples worrying about not having enough bread. Jesus noticed this and asked them how many basketfuls were there when he fed the 5000 and 4000 with only 5 and 7 loaves respectively. The disciples reply back saying 12 and 7 basketfuls respectively. What do you think was going through the minds of these disciples? To us it would seem so obvious that the feeding of the 5000 and 4000 is a miracle, but it seemed like the disciples couldn't put 2 and 2 together. They still did not understand. I'm sure we have all thought... "Man these disciples must be pretty dumb."

Now, after studying for this passage for the first time, I instantly thought those exact words. I thought how stupid these disciples were to NOT realize what was going on and trust that the LORD will provide. However, the more I thought about it... the more it seemed like the disciples weren't much different than the Pharaisees. Then it hit me, are we not like these disciples in our own daily lives?

You may ask, "What do you mean by that?" How many times have you said, "I'm not going to do this because I don't have enough money." Isn't that the same thing as the disciples saying, "It is because we have no bread." I think we all like to tell ourselves that we understand but do we truly understand? Are our hearts hard? To the point where we still constantly worry about "not having any bread?"

A friend of mine gave me this verse on a night where I was just crashing (it's been happening to me a lot lately). During that time, I was blaming a lot of things because of my past and just feeling really sorry for myself. Also, I have been complaining about not being able to get a job. This has been ongoing ever since summer now.

After I read this verse, the first thing that my friend mentioned was, "Hasn't God provided for you in every single way in the past? Why do you doubt Him now?" These words really stuck with me. Here I am complaining about all the "bad" things happening to me and thinking that there's nothing that can be done.

I've gotten to the point now where I am just sick and tired of complaining and feeling sorry for myself. It's not doing myself any good and it's not doing the people around me any good either. I look back and I do see all of the times where God has "feed the 5000" or "feed the 4000" in my life. I see that God has provided me in every tough situation; For every co-op job, in fact... EVERY job that I have ever gotten was provided by God. Every need, God was there. Do I really understand now? Why should I doubt Him now?

So in closing, I want to leave you all with this...

"Do you still not understand?"

Do Not Worry

Matthew 6:25-34

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important that food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, "What shall we eat?" or "what shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?" For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
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Now this is an intense verse. Basically it's saying... "Do not worry about anything in life." Now how easy does that sound? I think we all can say, "pftt... yah right. Easier said than done." Am I correct? Well, I'm definitely going through the same thing right now. For me, it's something I like to call the "Pre-graduation Blues." To put it simply, I am graduating but I have no idea where God is taking me. I haven't had any job interviews yet and things in life are really catching up with me.

I'm looking at myself right now and I see that I worry so much about the future and I don't focus on the present. Sometimes it even gets to the point where it's affecting the current ministries I'm in. I'm so worried about what I'm going to be doing with regards to my career and ministry. On top of all that, life has thrown some curveballs at me too. All of these things I worry about greatly. Everyday, I find myself applying for jobs and constantly checking my email to see if I have gotten any job interviews. Each day I keep on worrying about if I will get a job interview. It wasn't until recently when I read, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" What good is my worrying going to be? Will it make the employers want to choose me anymore more? Probably not.

I am very fortunate to be still living at home. I don't have to worry about a great deal of things such as rent, food, etc. I know a most of you have so much more to worry about. Some of you may be in huge amounts of debt, or are wondering, "How am I going to pay for next months rent?" or "What am I going to do for food this week?" I can't even begin to understand what you are going through, but I'll tell you this... God does. God knows exactly what your going through and He WILL provide for your needs. Just have a little faith.

So that being said, your still probably thinking, "MUCH easier said than done Justin!!" Well, I agree. But lets look back at scripture, "O you of little faith?" I don't know about you, but when I read this, that speaks right to my heart. How much faith do we actually have in God? Do we really believe that He can provide for your needs? The one who created us? Is it possible for Him?

Let me bring a different perspective in this. Do you put limits on God's power? Now, the right answer would be, "of course not!!" However in reality chances are, we do all the time. I'll use this story to illustrate. Lets say there is someone your "interested" in and it appears that they're interested in you. However, there's a catch... this other person lives far away from you. You two have been talking on the phone and both of you are scared to say anything about your feelings for each other. You continue thinking that... it won't work out because of the distance, so what's the point? Now based off of this last question, are you putting a limit on God's power? Did Jesus not feed 5000 people with only 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish? I'm not saying go head first into it but be smart about it and be patient. If God really wants it to happen, then it WILL happen. We really don't need to know the "how", "when", and "where" or sometimes the "why" portions of it. Even if we did, would we really understand what God's intentions are?

I'm going to end off with my favourite verses.

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

EVERY single time I start asking the question, "What am I going to do once I graduate?" These verses always comes back to smack me across the face. I'll share with you a recent experience I had. It was one of those situations where God opened the door for me but said, "I'm going to open this door for you but, I don't want you walk through it." Well, it was a job overseas in Haiti, and I would be helping design an orphanage. I turned it down. Over the next couple of days, I was beginning to wonder what was going to happen after I graduate. It was then where I started going onto job boards and looking for jobs. As I was searching for jobs, I had a stabbing feeling in my heart. It was almost as if God was saying to me, "You don't trust me?" Immediately, I shut down the windows and that stabbing feeling was gone.

For those who are reading this, I want to challenge you to memorize Matthew 6:33,34. I'll tell you now, it has saved me a lot of worry this year and over previous years too. It's worth it.

Also, if your up for it, try reading Matthew 6:19-34 everyday for a week. I did it with my Sunday School class on the portion of Simplicity and was it ever incredible. I still meditate on these verses because it gives me so much peace in my heart. Knowing that God is looking after me.

God Bless!

Authority...

Hebrews 13:17

Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.

What does it mean to "submit to their authority?" Lately, I have had so much trouble grasping this concept. I've read these verses before but I thought nothing of it. A couple of weeks back, a friend of mine challenged me, he said,

"Whatever ministry or church God brings you to, put your life into it. Also, be sure to respect and follow the authority figures."

"... respect and follow the authority figures..." why did that bother me so much? Later that day I sat down and meditated on what my friend said. Soon enough, it hit me. I started looking back at all the authority figures in my life: parents, coaches, teachers, elders, pastors. I realized... all these people, these authority figures, I've treated or am treating them very poorly right now. All my life, I have never really respected authority.

I start thinking about why... why am I like this? I look back as far as I can remember and it brings me to my Grade 6 year. Here I am, sitting in my classroom, kids all around me, laughing and making fun of me, screaming out "Chicken head! Chicken head!" My head was twitching a lot and I could not understand why I was like this. I came to the conclusion that there was something wrong with me. This continued throughout my elementary school years. It wasn't until my first year of highschool when my found out from my parents that I had Tourette's. There wasn't anything wrong with me and it wasn't something I could really control. That was the beginning of where I lost my trust in authority figures... Why did my parents and teachers knowing that I had Tourette's just sit back and watch me suffer emotionally? Couldn't they have done something? As the years went by, I only learned to rely on myself and my friends, those who are equal to me. I didn't trust or believe that older (wiser) people could know my best interests and I continued living my life like that... even to this day.

The more I think about it... the more God convicts me of this. I start flipping through my bible looking for any scripture relating to submitting to your authority. 1 Timothy 5:1*, 1 Peter 5:5**, Romans 13:1,2***, Deuteronomy 5:16****... all of these are passages relating to submitting to authority.

It wasn't until I hit 2 Peter 2:10 that really struck me,

"This is especially true of those who follow the corrupt desire of the sinful nature and despise authority." (For those who aren't familiar with the content before this verse, it's talking about the false teachers and their destruction)

I start to think about myself and where I'm at... am I following the path of destruction by not respecting authority? Are my desires corrupt?

Throughout these last couple of years, I have been leading IVCF. The last 8 years, I have been coaching Judo and co-leading my club. I am use to being a leader. However, the responsibilities in these positions and the titles of it is enough to make me proud. I've convinced myself in my mind that I am a "good leader". With this mindset, I seek out other leadership positions. I even went to asking my one of my Pastors if I could serve in a specific ministry. Well, I won't say his response but it wasn't an answer I wanted to hear. I was angry and I start thinking, "He knows nothing!"

Looking back at that now, I realize (even more now) that I am a proud person. I have a very hard heart. You could probably compare me to the Pharaisees. Who am I to say that I am ready to serve? Even the fact that I'm thinking I'm good enough shows that I am to proud and that I should not be leading these ministries. It was a good thing my Pastor did not accept my offer.

So what am I going to do about this? I have no idea. I've been trying to respect and listen to authority figures. It's very difficult for me. All I know is that I need a huge attitude adjustment. Slowly but surely, God is constantly healing the wounds in my heart from the past and is slowly taking away the hardness in my heart. It's a very long and painful process but I know it will be worth it in the end.

I guess another question can be... Are my experiences in control of my life or is God in control of my life?

For those who are still reading this part of my testimony, I hope you will remember to "submit to authority" and that "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." I can't tell you what it will be like in the longrun but I can tell you that this is what God commands us to do.

God Bless.

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*1 Timothy 5:1

Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father.

**1 Peter 5:5

Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility towards one another because,

"God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."

***Romans 13:1,2

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.

****Deuteronomy 5:16

Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the LORD your God is giving you.

God's Timing

I wish I could say I wrote this poem but I can't. It's a real inspiration to me and it's a good reminder to all of us that we are on God's Timing. I hope you all enjoy this.

"Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Matthew 6:34

God Bless!

My glory or God's glory?

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of God.

Galatians 1:10

Need I say more?

God Bless His Word.

"I will make your paths straight"

I'm running down the path all excited to see what is coming up, I see in the distance the peak of the mountain begin to grow. Every step I take the mountain gets larger, larger, and even larger. I say to myself, "I'm so excited to see what this mountain is! It's soo cool!!"

As I continue running the path, I can now see the details of the mountain. The rock formations, the trees, even a waterfall coming from the top of the mountain. It was absolutely beautiful!! I look even harder and there I see something I did not expect... another path? No wait... two other paths. All leading in different directions on that mountain.

My running has now died down to a slow jog, I look at the three paths on the mountain and begin to wonder, "Which path am I to take?" This question keeps on coming into my mind as I get closer and closer to the mountain.

In no time at all, I can already see the base of the mountain. The path that I am now walking on, I can see the three branches at the base of the mountain. I continue walking still thinking, "Which path am I going to take?" It wasn't until long that I was stopped at the base of the mountain looking at the three paths.

I look at each path and where each of them leads in the mountain. I can't even distinguish where each of them goes. The once beautiful mountain has now become a very large obstacle. I start to think. This is the first time where I actually had a chance to stop and think. Painful memories and emotions start to come into my mind and heart. Most of them were things of the past that I thought I was over. I begin thinking back to when I thought everything was great and I was running down the path. Why was I running in the first place?

My mind is now swarmed with these painful thoughts and emotions. I don't know how to feel or act. I just want it all to go away. I look at the three different paths and it only makes things worse. I'm so confused, so lost. I feel so helpless and alone. Why am I alone? Isn't God with me... wait a minute... where's God? Wasn't he walking with me down this path? Where is He now?

Then hit me... running... I soon realized, that I went ahead of God. I was so excited to see what happens next that I forgot... forgot that God was walking with me. I rushed ahead of Him and now, I am facing this mountain on my own. Facing the three paths in front of me. Facing all these thoughts and emotions. All alone...

I stand there, alone, wondering what I am to do. Still thinking constantly. Then a hand was placed on my shoulder. I looked to see who it was, it was God!! He caught up with me! He tells me, "Be patient my child. Trust in me with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all you ways acknowledge me, and I will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6)." After he said that, I looked back and the mountain I was facing had vanished. The three paths that stood before were straight and I could see where they lead to. The thoughts that were troubling me were now put to rest.

I realize now, that I am on God's Timing, not mine.

God vs. Money - The Eternal Battle!!

In society today, most of us are taught from birth that we need to do well in school so we can get a higher education all for the purpose of getting a good job and making lots of money and living a nice and comfortable life. Advertising tells us that we need to have materialistic things such as nice cars, the newest fashions, and the coolest toys to be happy.

However, in reality, once we get these things, we will always want more. We will always want the next best thing and all for what? Image? Satisfaction? Is it all worth it? Will we ever be satisfied?

Now what does the Bible say about money? It clearly says in 1 Timothy 6:10

For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

It is so easy to view Money as an idol. Since money is practically what we need to survive. It is so easy to always want and desire it. If we had to compare our relationship with Money with our relationship with God... Again, I think most of us can say that we're treating God pretty badly right now in comparison to how much we value Money.

Also, in Matthew 6:19-24

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!
No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

I want to bring attention the bold text. The first one "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Where is your treasure? Where is your focus? Is the thing you treasure the most your relationship with God or is it your bi-weekly paycheque? It's a tough question and I'm sure if we all had to answer that honestly, we would probably say it's the money. Myself included.

I want to bring forth a couple of core beliefs from my Sunday School from our section on Simplicity.

A. To believe that everything that we have is a gift from God - even our wage which we "earn".

Now we are taught to give approximately 10% of our wage in tithing. However, if you think about it, how did you come by that job in the first place? Where did that money come from? Was it not a gift from God? Isn't it true that EVERYTHING that you own is really God's and that He can choose when, where, and how to give it away?

C. To have our stuff available to others; willing to share, and even give away.

This is one that has really hit me hard. God has been really pressing on my heart to give what little I have away. As a student, I don't have very much money but I keep on reading this and I realize... it's not my money to begin with... If God wants to give it away to someone, I should be quick to do so.

This is my thoughts on the passage. Our earthly things, we need to be detached enough from them that if/when God calls us to give it away, we would be willing to give it freely.

I also want to bring attention to the second bold text, "You cannot serve both God and Money." I think that answers the question, "Is it possible to serve both God and Money?" Just like it mentions in 1 Timothy 6:10. Need I say more?

These are my thoughts on money and God. I really believe that God blesses us with money. Did he not bless Solomon with riches beyond his wildest dreams? 1 Timothy 6:10 says that "the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil..." Money itself is not evil, it is how we ourselves perceive it. If we begin to start loving money then it will corrupt us and lead us astray, "Either he will hate the one and love the other..." However, if we are responsible with it and remember that it is but a gift from God, then I really believe that we CAN live with both God and money.

GOD ALWAYS BEING NUMBER ONE IN OUR LIVES

God Bless you all!!

Cut it Off!!

If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life maimed than with two hands to go into hell, where the fire never goes out. And if your foot causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life crippled than to have two feet and be thrown into hell.

Mark 9:43-45


What does it really mean to "cut it off"? In this passage, they use the hand and the foot (and the eye if you read later). How important are the hands and the feet to us? If we were to lose our hand, our whole life will change. The same goes for one of our feet. We would be crippled and be confined to a wheelchair or crutches for life.

If something causes you to sin, you must cut it off. Even if it means that it will change your life. Let me share with you a few of my personal experiences with this.

The two biggest things that really cause me to sin are lust and pride along with many others too. If I could say what the source of what was causing me to sin lust wise, it would have been my laptop. I spent most of my days on my laptop and in turn, allowed myself to have more time to be tempted. Every single time, I thought it could summon up my own will power to control myself but I failed every time. I knew I needed to get rid of my laptop but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I was so dependent on it, until it died on me. Through God's Mercy, my laptop stopped working and I couldn't get it back even under warranty. The funny thing is, I wasn't really all that sad about it. My friend was able to help me back up my harddrive and actually, my 4th Year Project was all backed up too. So in reality, it didn't impact me at all.

After my laptop died on me, my life literally changed. I never spent nearly as much time on the computer and I felt that those lustful desires weren't as frequent. That was one of the things I needed to cut off. I'm not saying that I am perfect, heck, I still fall into that temptation quite a bit actually. However, it was one of the things that I NEEDED to stop using because it was causing me to sin.

Another situation is to do with pride. The biggest thing I took pride in was my reputation in Judo. For those who don't know me, I did Judo for 12 years and have my black belt. The reputation that I established myself around Saskatchewan and even in some parts in Canada as a model athlete and fairly good coach. So I had a lot of respect.

Well, it soon went to my head. I took pride in it and it actually became and idol to me. God spent 2 years breaking me out of Judo. He knew the only way to break me out of Judo was to make it so I didn't have enough time to do it. He did that. Both in Calgary and over this summer. It wasn't until this summer that I decided that enough was enough. Right there and then, I retired from Judo. Twelve years of my life, the the central foundation that I built for myself in Judo was literally torn down and my life was changed. Judo was causing me to sin and I needed to cut it off. Actually now, my mind is so clear because now I can rebuild that central foundation based on God. That was the HUGE plus side of it all.

I tell you now, pride, is and will always be an issue for me. Right now, I am constantly trying to keep myself humble so I won't be prideful. Actually, even now, with the amount of time I spend on the computer, I am actually boarderline cutting the internet off from my life. Doing that would definitely change my life and I am very hesitant to do it. Lets hope that by reducing the time I spend on the computer will help with that.

So what am I trying to say in this? If something is causing you to sin, you have to "cut it off". It may seem like it is impossible but, I tell you now, nothing is more liberating than just letting it go. Just from experience, God will most likely press on your heart to let something go if it has been causing you to sin.

Personally, I think this all links to Simplicity. Cutting it off makes life so simple because that is where we really begin to place our trust in God (I'll discuss more of that in future posts). Do you trust God enough to take care of you?

I will leave you with one more question. Is money causing you to sin? This is one of the things God has been really hitting me with and I will do another post in the near future.

God Bless you all!!

Forgive (& Forget?)

Imagine if someone you trusted, someone you considered a very close friend really hurt you, but it was unintentional. Would you forgive them if they asked for your forgiveness? How about someone you trusted, someone you considered a very close friend really hurt you, but it was intentional. Would you still forgive them if they didn't feel sorry for it? I think we all know the answer to that question, but in reality, would you be so quick to forgive?

What is forgiveness?

Dictionary.com says, "to grant pardon to". Multiple books have given a definition of forgiveness. Joshua Harris (Author of Boy Meets Girl) describes forgiveness to be this, "Forgiveness is a promise you make to the other person that you will not use the past against them." William P Young (Author of The Shack) describes forgiveness to be this, "When you forgive someone, you release your grip around their throat."

What makes us "not" want to forgive others? How can we be at peace in our own hearts, especially to those who really hurt us? No matter what the situation, intentional or unintentional, it is still hard to forgive, because you have been hurt. You start to ask ourselves, "Why did they do this? What did I do wrong?" You feel like you have been treated unjustly and in some occasions, thoughts about making them suffer the same pain you suffered. You know what though? That's natural. Our natural human tendencies are to be angry and bitter with the person/people who have hurt us.

I personally think that the emotions anger and bitterness play a huge factor in forgiveness. When we're actually angry or bitter towards someone, it takes our focus away from God and makes us ineffective. I think this is why in response to Peter's question when he asked Jesus how many times to forgive someone, Jesus responds, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." (Matthew 18:22). Also the fact that, "But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your transgressions." (Mark 11:26) Isn't that incentive enough to forgive?

Lets approach this from a different perspective. Is it worth your time and energy to stay mad at this person and not forgive them? Can't you use that energy to doing something more productive?

Ok, so lets say you have forgiven the person, but there is still something knawing in your heart. When you see or hear the person again, your heart tightens up and your all of a sudden in a bad mood. What is this feeling? You've forgiven them right? So what is it then? I think this is the "forget" part of "Forgive and Forget". Are we suppose to be happy with them and completely trust them again? There is no right answer to that, it is all dependent on the individual. There may be some smaller things that are easy to forget while other larger things that ring loud and clear after you forgive them.

It all comes down to trust. When you forgive someone, it doesn't mean you can really trust them again. If they have REALLY hurt you or betrayed you, then trust would be a hard thing to give the other person. Think about one of the definitions "you release your grip around their throat." It doesn't say you can trust the person right away again. I think all of you can agree with me that trust is a very delicate thing. It can take a lifetime to build but only take seconds to destroy. Don't expect after you have forgiven someone that you can trust them fully again, especially if it is big issue. Trust takes time to build/rebuild and you have to be patient. Especially if you are the one breaking that trust.

Remember, you are human after all. Only by God's strength is where you can find the strength to love them unconditionally again and to rebuild that trust.

This is my lover, this is my friend (Song of Songs 5:16)

I was sitting on the plane after a 5 week long working trip from a small town of Fort Nelson, BC. The weather was not the average BC weather, in fact, it was colder and drier than Saskatchewan weather but not as windy. I just finished reading the bible up in Fort Nelson and decided to read some random passages on the plane. It was a small 15 passenger plane and I had 2 seats to myself so I placed my bible down beside me after I finished reading to take a nap.

After about 5 minutes, of just thinking and staring out the window into the cloudy sky contemplating where my Engineering life is going to take me, I man walks up to me. He looks at me, I look at him and he says, "Do you mind if I sit down?" I was kinda bored and it would be been nice to have a good conversation, so I moved my Bible and let him sit beside me. To my surprise, his first comment was, "So you read the Bible huh?" I was shocked, I answered him saying that I finished reading the Bible just a couple of weeks prior. He was listening so much to what I had to say and he then asked another question, "Are you a Christian?" I answered him, "Yes." He then proceeded to asking me, "What did you learn the most from reading the Bible?" Now I went on explaining to him that I realized that a good portion of my friends are non-Christians and that it would be my greatest joy to see them all come to Christ. So that I can see them all again in paradise.

We then discussed multiple things that I cannot remember to well however, these next things he said will always stick with me. He asked if he could burrow my Bible to show me a verse. He opened the Bible to Song of Songs 5:16 and emphasized the phrase, "This is my lover, this is my friend." I don't remember him explaining it to me but he said these exact words, "This will be your life verse." So now here I am speechless and thinking, this guy is crazy!! What does this verse have anything to do with me? What does it mean? How can it be my life verse? While all of these questions were going through my mind, he then said to me, "I can see you being a missionary." So now after this, I was getting really scared. I never once mentioned that I had an interest in missions or my intentions in going to Urbana 06. How could this man have known all this and what compelled him to approach me to say all these things to me?

That day changed my life forever, the verse echoed in my mind day after day. I tell everyone about this story, and ask them if they knew what this verse meant. No one could tell me. After awhile, I gave up trying to understand it and it slipped through my mind. Every once in awhile, I will tell this story to some of my friends and bring up the verse but I never tried to understand it.

Until this summer. This summer has been a very difficult one for me and it was to the point where I did not know where my passions or goals lied. I was broken, I felt alone, and I felt so lost. My job took me away three nights a week which really made it hard to keep relationships with my friends. I cried, I had my heart broken, my foundations were torn down, I quit Judo, I'm not using facebook anymore, etc. This was all in the course of 4 months. If it were not for the wonderful invention of phone cards and my friends receiving my calls and listening to all my complaining, I really don't know what would have happened to me.

There was a point in this summer where I just couldn't take it anymore. After another argument with my mom, she said to me, "Maybe it's because of your negative attitude that is affecting your friendship." I was mad at her saying that to me because she still doesn't try to understand me, however, those words rung loud in my mind. I then realized, that that was one of the contributing factors of my unhappiness. Right then and there, I sat down, opened my journal and wrote all the wonderful things that have happened from these events. After seeing all these wonderful things, I decided to stop complaining about all the tough times I've been going through, but talk about all the things God has taught me this summer. How many people can say they have been transformed in a summer?

Here are a few of the many things I have learned.

I've realized what it really means to have God as your True Love. I am to the point where I don't have anything left of my heart to give to anyone and whatever I have left is now God's. If He wants to share it with anyone, He can choose to do so. The choice is no longer mine.

I now realized that God is not joking when He says, "I will NOT settle for second best." Now keep this in mind people, if you have something that is first before God... He WILL take it away. Come talk to me if you don't believe me.

God is my best friend.

I am on God's timing, not mine.

Now if you remember the story I just wrote about earlier. "This is my lover, this is my friend." I think I now understand what this verse means. It has almost been 2 years but I realized that I am on God's timing and not on mine.

God is my True Love, God is my Best Friend.

That hole that was burned into my heart is now filled with the Love of God.

God Bless

The Ultimate Cellular Phone Plan aka The Prayer Plan

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Cost (one time cost)

• Your Life

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Having a personal relationship with God is very important. One of the best ways to stay in contact with God is through prayer. This is a "service" that God offers us so that we can talk and chat with Him anytime and anywhere. There is only one cost of this service and that is our lives. I would say that that is a small price to pay to be in constant contact with God wouldn't you say so?

Abraham's Love, God's Love

I will never forget that night. I was lying in bed when I heard God call my name and I responded, "Here I am." God then said, "Take your son, your only son, Issac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about." After that, nothing. No reason, no other explanation, nothing.

I did not sleep that night. I thought to myself trying to figure out, "Why God is telling me to do this? Did He not say to me that through Issac, will be made a great nation? So why?" All of these "why" questions and not a single answer. God knows how much I love my son and He wants to take him away from me now.

I spend countless hours wrestling with these questions, trying to understand God's intentions. It was then I realized that I wasn't going to get any answers. God has commanded me to do this and that I must do it, even though I can never understand why.

It is now the third day of our travels and no I can see the place in the distance. These last couple of days, I was hoping that God would say something to retract his command but nothing. I look at my son Issac and he was pretty excited that we were close to the place. I think to myself, "I am actually going to have to go through with this." I paused for what seemed like an eternity and finally decided to continue on. I realized that my love for God is far more greater than my love for my own son.

So I told my servants to stay with the donkey and took Issac with me. I allowed Issac to carry the wood while I carried the knife and fire. Issac loves to help me out with this and tells me all about the great times him and his friends had. I just love hearing about his stories and adventures.

As we continues to walk I just want to cry. A huge lump starts to come into my throat and my heart is starting to beat faster and faster. Issac looks around and says, "The fire and wood are here, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" What a smart kid. Holding back the tears
and swallowing the huge lump in my throat, I told him "God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son."

Shortly after, we reached the place where God told me about. I spent the next hour building the alter taking my time. In the background I can hear Issac occupying himself and playing with a bug of some sort. Once I am finished building it, my son asks again, "Where is the lamb?" I don't answer. Instead, I tell him to come to me. He walks over. I kneel down looking face to face to him. So innocent, so young. I told that we were going to play a game and that if he followed the rules, I would give him an extra helping of dessert. My son was so excited because he LOVED his dessert. I told him that it was a trust game and that he needed to be completely still and close his eyes and not peek. That he needed to trust in me. Issac nodded understanding the rules and proceeded to close his eyes and just stand still. He's such a good boy.

I took out the rope and bound him and kept asking him if he was peeking. Of course he wasn't, he REALLY wanted the extra dessert. I pick him up, eyes still closed and placed him on the alter. It was at this moment that I couldn't hold back the tears. My heart felt like it was going to explode. Every part of me was telling me that I shouldn't go through with this but I reach for my knife anyways. I grab onto the hilt and pull it out of the sheath. It felt heavy, I just wanted to drop it and go home. I look at the blade and then look at my son, lying there still as a statue eyes still closed. Tears streaming down my face I constantly fight against the urge to turn away. I slowly bring up the knife ready to slay my son. Whatever I have been feeling has now been magnified 10 times. I take one last teary look at my son. I lift up my dagger, ready to strike.

Just as I am about to plunge the dagger into my son, I hear a clear voice calling, "Abraham! Abraham!" It was one of the LORD's angles. "Here I am." I replied. The angle said, "Do not lay a hand on the boy. Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son." As soon as I heard this, I dropped the dagger and quickly unbound my son. I told him he could open his eyes and said that he won the game. He was so excited but then looked at me and asked, "Daddy, why are you crying?" All I could do was smile. What an observant kid I thought.

It was then we both hear something. We both look up and in the thicket a ram caught by its horns. I pointed to the ram and told Issac, "You see, the LORD provided the lamb for the burnt offering." So I took the ram and sacrificed it and named the place, The LORD Will Provide.

I then heard the angle call my name and he said, "I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son. I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me."

===================================================================

So I was lying in bed last night and thought about how much Abraham loved the LORD that he was going to slay his ONLY son for Him. Now I thought about when Jesus came to the earth. Jesus was God's only son. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, and whosoever believes in him, shall not perish but have everlasting life." - John 3:16. Now think about this, if you draw a parallel between God and Abraham, and Jesus and Issac. Both God and Abraham were willing to sacrifice their only son for Us and God respectively. Except the only difference is, Abraham did not have to sacrifice his son but Jesus was sacrificed.

Can we even being to fathom the love that Abraham had for God? Can we even fathom the love that God has for us? God spared Issac because he Loved us so much. So much that he sacrificed his OWN son. So if you are ever wondering if God Loves you, think about this. Think about the sacrifice that He has made for us.

For me, I've decided to quit Judo. For those who don't know me all that well, Judo is a HUGE part of my life. I've been doing it for 12 years and got my black belt. I've been coaching for 6 years and am very well respected as a coach throughout Saskatchewan and even in Ottawa. Coaching is something that I have a lot of joy in doing and I just love seeing the growth of my students. Slowly but surely, God has been breaking me out of Judo. It seems like everywhere I go, I don't have time for it. So now I've decided that I will give it up for God. I think in comparison to Abraham, that my situation is nothing in comparison to what Abraham had to do. This is just a little thing that I can do to tell God that I love him.

I pray that for those who spent the time reading this will be blessed and realize that God does love you.

God Bless!!

Trust Me

Being a fisherman isn't always easy. My brother Andrew and I have to get up before the sun rises to get our fishing nets and boats ready. We then spend the whole day casting our nets. We stay out there until the sun sets and then we go home, eat, and then get to sleep waiting for the next day to come. I can't say this is my dream job though, but hey, at least it puts food on the table right?

Today was just one of those days. Our fishing spot in the Lake of Gennesaret was just not the hot spot for fish today. We have been casting our nets all day but yet, not a SINGLE catch. I can see in the distance James and John were not having any luck either. As the sun began to disappear over the horizon, I decided that it wasn't going to get any better. So I told Andrew that we should pack it in and he agreed so we went back to the shore.

We bring our boat to the shore and get out to pull it in. There was a man who I did not recognize standing there for awhile just looking at us. He must have been there for a couple of hours at least. I ask my brother if he knew who he was and he mentioned that it was Jesus. I was shocked at this, I heard so much about this man, especially from John the Baptist. Why would he be in a place like this?

As I was thinking this, he began to walk towards me. What was he doing? Why was he walking towards me? He continued walking past me to my boat and stepped in it. Jesus then asked me to put out a little bit from the shore. I was pretty confused, what was he getting at? But, not wanting to say "no" my brother and I cast out our boat once again. As we were making our way to the fishing spot he indicated, he sat down at the head of the boat and started teaching. I have only heard about his teachings from others but in person... wow... absolutely incredible. His followers, must be the best of the best.

We get to the location in a short period of time and then Jesus tells me to put out into deep water, and let down the nets. Now this confused me even more. I am sure he noticed that we haven't caught anything all day and I mentioned that to him. However, since he was a great man, I did as he said. I let down the nets and waited. Not long after I let down the nets I could feel tugging on the nets. I began to pull them up and to my surprise, they were full of fish! I have never seen so much fish in my life! I pull up the net and throw down another, the same thing! Any nets that I put in the lake were so full of fish. Some of my nets were even starting to break because of the weight. It came to the point that my boat could not handle all of the fish so I called the other boats to help. We continued fishing for hours and hours. The same thing happened to the other boats as it did my boat. The excitement got to all of us. We fished so much that we didn't realize that we exceeded the maximum weight of our boat. We were starting to sink!! We barely made it back to the shore.

I looked at all this fish and I looked at Jesus. I realized that this man, was indeed a holy man. I feel to my knees and bowed in fear because I was a sinner. I asked Jesus to go away from me. I was scared, I didn't know what to say. Was he going to tell me how much of a sinner I am, was he going to turn me into something? I am absolutely terrified right now. All I knew was that I did not deserve to be in his presence. I look to my left and right to see my brother Andrew, James, and John all just staring in amazement. We all seem to be handling this situation in a different way.

Then I feel a hand on my shoulder, I lift my head up and it was Jesus looking straight at me. The smile on his face, his eyes meeting mine, he opens his mouth and begins to speak in a calm inviting voice, "Don't be afraid; from now on you will catch men. Come, follow me." He looked up to Andrew, James, and John and said the same thing to them also. We looked at each other in amazement. Jesus has just called us to be his followers! We are just but meer fisherman but yet, Jesus has called us. A great man. Immediately, we pulled our boats to the shore and left everything.

The unknown, we don't know the where, when, why, and how. We don't know anything. All we are doing is following Jesus. We have placed our full trust in following Jesus, our lives, everything.

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Recently, I have felt like Simon (Peter). I use to be comfortable where I was and I had a plan. However, Jesus then said to me "Come, follow me." To abandon everything, the things you love to do, the people you care about the most. All for the sake of Jesus. To take that step out into the unknown. To just immediately go and follow Jesus and leave everything. I wish I could do that.

I do know one thing that I have done though, and that is to follow Jesus where He takes me. I don't know where that is going to be, or when it is, or how I am going to get there. All I know is that I have to entrust EVERYTHING with Jesus. Letting go of someone you really care about is one of the hardest things to do. But it needs to be done. Especially if Jesus is calling to you to trust Him.

I would like to leave you all with a couple of questions. Do you trust God? Are you prepared to leave everything when he calls you? I hope this has inspired you as much as it has inspired me.

God Bless you all!!

Endless Love

This song is such a beautiful song. I can't understand a word of it but the instant I heard it, I loved it. I feel a great sense of peace when I hear this song.

It's sung by Jackie Chan (Yes, he sings) & Kim Hee Seon. The song is from a movie called "The Myth". If anyone is interested in watching it, I have it at my place. Let me know if you are interested and we can arrange a movie night.

I strongly recommend listening to the song without subtitles first.

Without Subtitles

With Subtitles

Enjoy!

Until

So during certain points in my life, I will hear a song and say to myself "This song speaks to me." I love to use songs as a way to show what I am going through in certain times.

This song has been speaking to me lately. Because of the fact that I always seem to get ahead of myself and not wait for God. It's been a great encouragement for me.

These are the lyrics to a song from Mark Harris. If you get a chance to listen to the song. Please do, it's such a great song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mvVTxpOUJw

Until

Is it unfair to say that You are leading,
Then try and face this mountain on my own,
Why am I scared, I've never stopped believing,
And You never left me alone.
Well, I can get ahead of where you've led me to,
But I will trust Your heart enough to wait for You ...

CHORUS:

Until this mountain moves,
Until the path is clear,
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear.
Until I see Your hand,
Until I know Your heart,
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far
I will be still, until ...

How could I have never seen this coming,
It's not like I've been running from Your will,
Tell me why each day's another mystery,
Waiting for Your truth to be revealed,
I try to tell my heart to trust what I believe,
And wait on You through all of my uncertainty ...

CHORUS:

Until this mountain moves,
Until the path is clear,
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear.
Until I see Your hand,
Until I know Your heart,
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far
I will be still, until ...

Bridge:

Be still my heart of worry,
Be still my restless soul,
Be confident and certain,
Be still and know

CHORUS:

Until this mountain moves,
Until the path is clear,
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear.
Until I see Your hand,
Until I know Your heart,
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far
I will be still, until ...
Oh, I will be still, until

Lyrics from www.lyricsmania.com

The Highway of Life

You've been driving for hours. Staring off in the distance is a neverending stretch of road ahead of you. The inviting warmth of the sun illuminates everything around you and shows God's work at it's best.

As you look furthur ahead though, you see dark clouds in the distance. As you continue driving, the clouds get closer and closer, the sun starts to disappear behind the darkness of the clouds. It all seems to happen so fast. The next thing you know, the sun has disappeared behind the clouds. Everything around you seems to lose it's life. You look out your winshield, and you see this wet spot on there, a few seconds later, another one, and then another one. Before you know it, it's pouring. The feelings of sadness start creeping in. Your no longer enjoying the beauty around you but are frustrated with all the rain. As you continue to drive in the neverending rain, you start feeling lonely and depressed. You say to yourself, "When is this going to stop? When do I get to see the light again?" You pray to God asking Him to show you the light but nothing. Hours pass by and yet no light. You begin to wonder if the light has disappeared forever? "Will I see the light again?"

Just when all hope is lost, just when you feel that you can't take the darkness anymore, you see something in the distance. You look up to the clouds in the distance and you don't see them as darkness, but you see them illuminated. The lonliness and depression you were feeling begins to melt away. The clouds that were once darkness has become the most beautiful site you have ever seen. The clouds are now light.

Shortly after, you see a sign indicating your destination. You have made it. There is light at the end of tunnel.

This inspiration came to me today. It was raining all day and I never saw the light. I was feeling so lost and hopeless inside and wasn't sure if I could take it anymore. Towards the end of the day though, I look into the distance and see light, coming out of the clouds that once harboured the darkness. Seeing that reminded me that the light was never gone, it was only hidden by the darkness. That darkness being the pains in my heart and selfish desires. "When all you can see is your pain, perhaps then you lose sight of me?" (The Shack).

Right now in my life, I am driving through that dark storm. The sorrows, the pain, the suffering that fill my heart. There have been many times that I've wanted to just give up. However, I realized that God's light is only hidden because of this pain and suffering. I have to keep driving down "The Highway of Life" out of the storm. Even though it may seem hopeless, the storm will eventually pass, and the light will shine ever so brightly. Slowly but surely, I will reach the destination where God wants me to go.